When I handed the cab driver the $20 bill and asked, “All right?,” he replied hesitantly, “As good as gold.” It was a race against time for him to get into his cab and leave.
In contrast to my expectations, he was friendly and willing to help me find the location I had given him at the airport even though it took us a while to find it. This was, of course, before the advent of GPS!
The emotional rollercoaster I was about to embark on as a new immigrant to New Zealand began with this moment.
The first few days were filled with anticipation and happiness. I was changed into a wide-eyed immigrant drawn by the appeal of my new surroundings after learning about a new country, meeting kind people, and gaining new knowledge.
Eventually, the high began to dwindle as I became discouraged by an onslaught of rejection. Each and every one of my job applications were politely turned down with a letter. Due to my lack of prior work experience in the area, I was being told that I was highly undesirable by potential employers. No one was even interested in speaking with me, much less interviewing me.
How was I going to get out of this pickle? Getting local experience is impossible without employment while getting employment is impossible without local experience!
Eventually, after months of fruitless searching, the rollercoaster started to rise again. Were I to enroll in a nearby institution after being refused an interview by businesses, I would have had an easier time finding work. My first employment came as a result of an out-of-the-box strategy, thanks to a university contact. At long last, a feeling of happiness!
My time in the country had already elapsed when the rollercoaster assumed a new rising trajectory. After about four or five years, my job situation had stabilized and I was happy with my decision to move to New Zealand. It’s not just the journey that takes a long time when you’re moving to a new country!
The reason I’m telling you about my emotional rollercoaster is so you can learn from my mistakes and successes. Ultimately, my goal is to help anyone who finds themselves in a similar predicament to realize they are not alone and that with the right attitude, they can conquer any hurdle.
The Six Ps
Using “The Six P’s,” I’d summarise your journey from where you are to where you want to be using “The Six S.”
To begin, let’s look at the three Ps to stay away from.
Losses and adversity should not be PERSONALIZED.
1. It’s vital to distinguish your failures from who you are.
Self-esteem declines and we fall into the pit of despair and unhappiness if we take rejections, setbacks, and difficulties personally.
Even without an interview, I was rejected over 200 times before landing my first job. Even though I would never wish it on anyone, I have to admit that I was fortunate enough to avoid sinking into the abyss of insignificance. This difficult time in my life was significant in helping me become more resilient, looking back.
2. Avoid letting a failure take over your life.
If you have a failure or setback in one aspect of your life, it should not spill over into other parts of your life.
It was only natural for me to draw connections between my job search failure and everything else that was going on in a new country as my emotional rollercoaster began to crash. My head began to spin with doom and gloom.
It’s a small world for me here.
- “This isn’t where I belong.”
- “I was born to do this.”
Unless you intervene quickly, prevalent thinking has the unfortunate effect of becoming self-fulfilling. Taking a class was a great idea because it kept my mind off of other things.
3. You should never think of a setback as PERMANENT.
Every world crisis has come to an end. It doesn’t matter what the problem looks to be, there is always a way out. There is solace in world history and the knowledge that your crises will pass as well; even if you can’t see it right now.
It took me a long time as a migrant to find a job, but it was successful. My attempts would have sputtered if I’d adopted a persistent mindset of “I’ll never succeed here,” for example. When our efforts start to flag, we stop getting the results we were hoping for.
The three P’s must now be implemented!
1. PATIENCE IS A SKILL THAT MUST BE LEARNED.
The saying “excellent things take time” is surely familiar to you. That is something you can have faith in!
A few things take a lot longer than we’d like them to take. That’s just how things work in life. Patience is a virtue when it comes to waiting as the procedure is monitored. Make a commitment to the process and wait for the outcomes.
2. Perseverance is a virtue to cultivate.
People usually give up just as they are getting close to solving a problem. What separates winners from also-rans is the ability to persevere in the face of adversity or to go forward despite failures.
The road to success is paved with potholes. Become more adept at overcoming obstacles so you can keep moving forward in pursuit of your goals. Consider accepting help, or reaching out to others for help—do whatever it takes to keep moving forward.
3. Find out what YOU WANT TO ACHIEVE.
For me, this third P is the most important since it serves as a springboard for the other two Ps you should use to achieve success.
When the going gets tough, it’s all too easy to give up without a good reason to stick with it. Purpose provides the fuel for motivation.
Find out why you want what you want. What gives you the energy to do the things you do? Find out what’s really going on beneath the surface by digging deep—your genuine WHY may be hidden beneath a layer of surface WHYs.
If you don’t know why you want something, it would be difficult to retain your patience and perseverance.
A roller coaster ride of highs and lows is the nature of life. Recognizing and accepting this fact enhances our resilience in the face of hardship greatly. Unrealistic expectations are the root of the majority of our life’s disappointments.
Take a seat, buckle up, and have fun on the emotional rollercoaster that is life.